Tuesday, August 10, 2010

Beyond Stressed

I think there's a point when you're so stressed out you just become numb. Deadlines are piling up around me and not just at my normal day job. Of course I can't be like every other person and have one job - no I have to be superwoman and have about 5 or 6. Anything else you would like me to take on? I'll probably say yes because apparently I don't know how to say no.

Not a good little pattern I've gotten myself into.

I kind of want to just have a good cry, but...

1) I don't cry (there goes that plan)

AND

2) I can't feel anything to muster up some sort of reaction beyond some sort of intense/empty look on my face

Those of you who really know me, know that I love everything I do. That's the problem. I wouldn't trade my life for anything, but there are those days (and nights like this one) where I honestly don't know how I've gotten myself here. It's 10:51pm and I'm probably going to be pulling an all nighter and heading to a meeting for 8:30am tomorrow. It sounds like it might be a glasses kind of day...maybe they can hide the bags under my eyes...

It's ironic though because I'm not even upset or concerned....just numb. It will get done because I'll make sure it gets done no matter what, but I can't help wondering if my body can put up with it forever. My guess is probably not.

If I can just survive the next two days I'll never do this to myself again.

Who am I kidding - you know I will

If I didn't have my family and friends to pick me up sometimes I don't know what I would do. Thank you for putting up with me and this crazy life. I love you all <3

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