It's definitely that time of year where you reflect on the past and look ahead to the future and figure out what you really want in your life. That's what I love about resolutions. They really show you exactly where you are and what kind of person you've become and want to be....
My one very big new years resolution is to not care so much about what others think about me and stay as far away from drama as I possibly can....
I know it might sound like a weird resolution, but I constantly find myself in situations that people wouldn't even believe. I am put in the middle of friends, the middle of rumors (horrible ones at times) and the middle of things I definitely don't want any part of. I really just want this year to be DRAMA FREE! That is a big thing to hope for, but I'm going to try my very best to have a fresh start. I want to pull away from those who bring me down and surround myself with the real people who care about me. Sometimes I think when I put all my energy into making everyone else around me happy or not mad at me, it ends up backfiring. My best friends like to tell me I'm too nice in situations and walk right into trouble. Don't get me wrong, for those of you who know me I know I am extremely confident, independent and confrontational BUT what I think they mean is that I really don't want to start any trouble at all. The problem has and always will be that I won't back down to anyone who is talking behind my back and I will defend myself and my friends no matter what. You can see how that might cause some issues....
What I don't understand is that I'm 21, in my fourth year at University, and I still feel like I'm back in high school sometimes. It is just such a waste of time for everyone involved. It's crazy how rumors can get so out of hand and blown out of proportion that people you thought you could trust and who were your friends actually believe it. I just found out that that is exactly what's been going on with a few people I know back in Toronto recently. I was pretty upset about it, but I woke up today and realized that there's nothing else I can do. I know what I know and I can sleep at night knowing that I've been honest with everyone, but I can't change everyone's mind or opinion. I came to terms with the fact that people are going to judge me on preconceived assumptions and false accusations, but that happens all the time and I have to let it roll off my back. I've realized that life is never going to be perfect and not everyone is going to like me or my actions, but that's life. If you live every day worrying about what is making other people happy you won't be happy and I definitely want to be happy. I am putting anything negative from the last year behind me and moving forward into this new year and can't even imagine where I'm going to end up.
What's your new years resolution?
1 comment:
Hi there! And happy New Year! I'm so glad you decided to continue with your blog. Fans always love to know what's next in their gym stars' life. So, it's nice to know that you enjoyed snowboarding for the first time (I've never tried it) and that you have a good feeling about 2009. I wish you all the best for the times to come and hope we could get in touch sometimes.
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